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How to break down an us and them culture: The power of human connection in leadership

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We are more decent up close.

When we interact with others directly, we tend to treat them better. Because we see their humanity, understand their challenges and treat them with greater decency.

Whereas from a distance, it’s easier to dehumanise others and ignore the impact of our words and actions, or to let assumptions affect our judgement.

There’s an important leadership lesson in this, which works in two directions.

When we engage directly with our teams – especially front line staff once we become managers of managers – we create proximity between us and them. Which breaks down the very sense of ‘us and them’.

And this works both ways.

When we’re sitting around the boardroom with our executive colleagues, this forces us to consider the real impacts of decisions on our teams. This isn’t just good for frontline staff, it creates long-term organisational success.

Likewise, it forces frontline staff to see senior managers as real people. This undermines any temptation to see them as ivory tower dwelling, bland suit wearing corporate drones. Which creates space for critical thinking instead of blind distrust, for asking questions instead of making assumptions, and for speaking up when peer-pressure might otherwise drive them into an us and them mentality (which can be promoted by other disaffected staff, unions etc.).

So, what’s the action? Make a habit of regularly – if not daily – interacting with your people on a human level. Learn their names, say hello, look them in the eye, show an interest in their being beyond work and acknowledge their humanity.

It’s not complicated, but it can be intimidating when you’re not used to doing it.

But – if you start today – it will get easier tomorrow, and the day after and so on… just start.

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