Position vs interest: The leadership mistake hiding in plain sight

Here’s a story about two crazy French chefs cooking for Louis XIV.

They’re both freaking out that they’ll get the guillotine if they stuff up their dish.

One needs a lemon for the main. The other a lemon for the dessert. But there’s only one lemon left.

This leads to a massive argument where they each try to overpower the other with arguments about why they’re more deserving of the remaining lemon.

But neither budges or changes course, so they end up splitting the lemon down the middle.

Which leads to two mediocre dishes.

Turns out though that one chef only needed the juice and the other the rind.

This is a common leadership mistake – we launch straight in to arguing over positions rather than leading with curiosity about the other party’s needs. We assume it’s a zero sum game, when it’s often not.

Not every negotiation has a win-win solution, but many do.

But we’ll never find them if we don’t start by asking better questions.

What if you didn’t have to work these things out on your own?

Most leadership missteps aren’t about capability – they’re about thinking in isolation, under pressure, with no space to slow down and challenge assumptions. Management and leadership coaching gives you that space. A place to step back, test your thinking, ask better questions and handle complex conversations with more clarity and confidence. If you’re seeing the same patterns repeat, a short, obligation-free discovery call can help you work out whether coaching would be useful in your context.